The Discarded Wife: A Profile of Fear and Disillusionment

I am a discarded wife. I thought we had a great marriage. We have great kids and a nice home. Our lives were full of date nights, family cookouts, and soccer games. We loved to have friends over. Until my husband decided to throw us away. One day, he just woke up and quit our family, and now he wants a divorce.

Woman lying on bed

He wants a divorce.

I don’t want a divorce. In my family, we don’t get divorced: we stay married. How do I explain to my parents that my husband is just leaving? I don’t know how to explain this to our children. He’s already moved out, and he keeps telling the children that they can come and visit him on the weekends! They live here! IN. THIS. HOUSE. This is where we’ve raised them, where their rooms are. They don’t want to go and “visit” at some new place just because he decided it.

He just wants to quit, and I can’t believe he’s doing this to me and to the kids. I’ve done everything for this family. I take care of the house, and it’s beautifully furnished. I’ve spent hours and days and weeks making it perfect for us. And now, even though I’ve put all this time and work into this house, now he’s just going to take half of the furniture?! This is not fair.

How am I supposed to make this work? How do I pay for this house now that he’s moving out? I don’t make enough money on my own. He needs to come back home to us.

I’m afraid of the future.

I don’t want to be alone. I didn’t sign up to be a discarded wife. He’s supposed to do this WITH ME. I don’t want to date again. I don’t want to be the only person at holiday parties without a partner. I don’t want to be the person my friends feel sorry for. I don’t want to go to bed alone. I’m so afraid that I cannot get through this.